Veterans Day Weekend Buddy Check!

 

Team, this weekend is going to be hard. It's Veterans Day weekend and our Facebook feeds will be full of pictures and tributes to those we've lost to combat and to suicide. And it is hard. I'm not here to force-feed you some rah-rah message about how life can change; I'm here to stand with you - because this weekend consistently sucks every single year and we need each other right now. 

Please do your buddy checks this weekend, and nag the shit out of the people you love. Make sure they are okay! Having people who care for us and believe in us can can make all the difference in our ability to cope with and recover from difficult events.

I've never met a combat Vet who lost more buddies to war than they did to suicide, and that's not okay. Rather than doing 22 push-ups, I encourage you to pick up the phone and call someone to check in. 

If you learn that your battle buddy is in trouble, here's how to get help: call the Veterans Crisis Line at 1-800-273-8255 and Press 1 or send a text to 838255. You can text the crisis line while you are on the phone. Ask you buddy where they are located, who is with them, and whether or not they have a weapon. Pass this info on to the crisis line; they will send emergency services. 

I know that no one wants to piss off their buddy, but no one wants another dead buddy either - so choose your battles. The single most loving thing anyone ever did for me personally was stage an all-out intervention; it saved my life. 

Please consider sharing this info. Thanks, Team - stay safe out there.

TL;DR: call your battle buddy, and if they need it, get them help!

AND YOU - if you're in this head space, talk to someone now - like right now. Call your buddy, call the crisis line, do whatever it takes to hang on until this feeling passes because the world would not be better off without you.

*****

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*****

“If you believe change is possible, you want to change, and you are willing to do the work, you absolutely CAN get your life back.”

*****

Get your copy of The Soldier's Guide to PTSD,  

or Acknowledge & Heal, A Women's-Focused Guide to PTSD,

or After the Call, A First Responder’s Guide to PTSD

World Mental Health Day is October 10th

The objective of World Mental Health Day is to raise awareness of mental health issues around the world and to mobilize efforts in support of mental health. So let's talk about it.

A person's mental and emotional well-being is essential for a healthy life. When individuals struggle with mental illness or substance abuse, it profoundly affects all aspects of their lives and the people they care about.

When discussing mental health, another term often arises: resilience. We discussed this before and dispelled the myth that those with PTSD are "not resilient."

Resilience is not an innate quality; it is developed through facing challenges and overcoming adversity throughout one's lifetime. However, being resilient does not mean that a person is immune to difficulties or distress in their life. It means that they have the ability to adapt in the face of trauma, tragedy, and threats.

Remember that word, adapt. It’s a verb, an action word. It means we have to do something.

To promote resilience, we have to develop protective factors like exercise, a healthy diet, a healthy sleep schedule, good communication, and most important of them all, a healthy support network. 

We may not always be able to sleep eight hours, stick to a healthy diet, or maintain a good schedule at the gym. Life happens when we make our best plans, so those can’t be the only strategies we turn to. 

Resilience is active, right? So we need to move to the next item on our list. A healthy support network.

When we’re struggling and in need of help, we have to communicate our needs. And that’s where having a healthy support network comes in. There’s not enough sleeping or eating right in the world that is going to fortify a person against the effects of trauma. To borrow a phrase, “it takes a village.” 

When there are people ready and willing to step in and help (peers, partners, friends, and/or family), you are better able to cope with difficult situations. Social support has been shown to reduce our level of stress during troubling situations. And knowing someone “has your back” creates the opening to do the hardest thing possible. It allows you to be open and ask for help when you need it.

Remember, resilience isn’t “toughing it out through the worst situations”. It’s having a strategy and support system in place...and using it when you need it.

*****

We value your feedback and ideas! 

Reach out on our Community Facebook Page!

*****

“If you believe change is possible, you want to change, and you are willing to do the work, you absolutely CAN get your life back.”

Get your copy of The Soldier's Guide to PTSD, The Soldier's Workbook, 

or Acknowledge & Heal, A Women's-Focused Guide to PTSD

Let's Understand what Compassion Fatigue is

Compassion Fatigue was coined by Charles Figley in the 1980s and refers to a set of negative psychological symptoms that caregivers experience in the course of their work while being exposed to direct traumatic events or through secondary trauma. 

Compassion fatigue is an erosive process, not attributed to a single exposure to trauma. It is the result of ongoing, repeated exposure to traumatic situations, whether direct or indirect. Over time, the act of providing care in the context of human suffering and trauma wears down the individual's psychological resilience, leaving the care worker in a combined state of burnout that leads to more serious mental health conditions such PTSD, anxiety or depression. 

Essentially, the continuous exposure to the trauma of others may lead care work professionals to manifest the same or similar symptoms as the trauma survivors they have helped. 

This places many occupations such as law enforcement, first responders, healthcare professionals, teachers, and community service workers right in the crosshairs if they have the risk factors to be affected by it. Between 40% and 85% of helping professionals develop vicarious trauma, compassion fatigue and/or high rates of traumatic symptoms, according to compassion fatigue expert Francoise Mathieu. 

During a TED Talk in 2017, Patricia Smith, the founder of the Compassion Fatigue Awareness project, had this to say,

“Caregivers are not good at asking for help. Asking for help is hard, no matter who you are. For nurses, doctors, teachers and more, the idea of leaving work can seem like an impossibility. You may feel guilty or that you are abandoning your patients or students. But if you are struggling with drug or alcohol use, you need help too. Your clients, patients and students will be happy for you.” 

Some common signs of compassion fatigue include exhaustion, anger and irritability, negative coping behaviors such as alcohol or drug abuse, emotional detachment or numbness, burnout, and impaired decision-making abilities.

So how can you prevent compassion fatigue from taking over your life? Here are some key things to keep in mind:

1. Take care of your own well-being: As a caregiver, it's natural to put others' needs before your own. However, it's crucial to prioritize your own mental and physical health to avoid reaching a breaking point.

2. Acknowledge your limitations: You're only human, and there's only so much you can do. Don't be afraid to ask for help when you need it or delegate tasks if possible.

3. Practice self-care: Make time for activities that bring you joy and help you relax. Whether it's exercising, reading a book, or spending time with loved ones, self-care is essential for recharging your emotional batteries.

4. Don't ignore warning signs:

• Depression
• Frustration
• Feelings of uselessness
• Cynicism
• Feeling disconnected from others
• Worries you’re failing at your job
• Constantly feeling exhausted or tired
• Feeling the need to drink alcohol or do drugs

If you notice any of the warning signs mentioned above, don't brush them off. Address them and seek help before they escalate. Seek help from resources like supervisors, peer-support groups, or clinical practitioners before it becomes too overwhelming.

Compassion fatigue may be a common occurrence in caregiving professions, but it doesn't have to take control of your life.

*****

How do you handle compassion fatigue?  

We value your feedback and ideas! 

Reach out on our Community Facebook Page!

*****

“If you believe change is possible, you want to change, and you are willing to do the work, you absolutely CAN get your life back.”

Get your copy of The Soldier's Guide to PTSD, The Soldier's Workbook, 

or Acknowledge & Heal, A Women's-Focused Guide to PTSD