Trauma Reactions: Fight, Flight, and Freeze

Fight or flight. We hear this all the time, but freeze is the red-headed step-child of trauma. Fight, flight, and freeze are all normal neuro-biological responses to fear, but, if we don’t know this, we can feel guilty or angry or like we “let it happen” when our body freezes in the face of trauma. 

First, let’s wipe out the fantasy that we have a choice whether our body goes into fight, flight, or freeze - because that’s not a thing. When we’re in danger, our brain kicks into high gear and takes over to protect out life. You do not get a choice; in a split second your brain makes the choice for you. 

Think about those nature shows where lions are hunting gazelle-snacks. No gazelle is going to get its back up and whoop some lion’s ass, so he’s left with two choices: flight or freeze - and both of these are legit survival methods. The eye sees what is moving (“I’m up, they see me, I’m down”) so a lion may not notice the stock-still gazelle frozen right next to him. The folks who design military training know this and we go to great measures to train the freeze out of us. Live-fire exercises, rote memorization questioning techniques, fire and movement - we do this training over and over again so that our brain passes over freeze and jumps into habit under fire. But no one trains us how to get raped, or how to hold a buddy while they die, or how to respond when we see a detainee get schwacked. That is not a thing, my friends. There is no fighting back, there is no running away; we freeze. 

The degree of self-blame that comes with freeze is overwhelming. Sometimes we have this fantasy that, “if I didn’t freeze, everything would have been different,” or “if I didn’t freeze, I could have fought back.” 

I say this with love: it’s possible that you’re wrong. Freeze is not a choice; your brain took over and kept you alive.

Bottom line is that you deserve to get your life back, and there are therapy treatments (like Prolonged Exposure Therapy, Cognitive Processing Therapy, and EMDR) that are designed to help you with your symptoms. You can do this.

*****

“If you believe change is possible, you want to change, and you are willing to do the work, you absolutely CAN get your life back.”

Get your copy of The Soldier's Guide to PTSD, The Soldier's Workbook, 

or Acknowledge & Heal, A Women's-Focused Guide to PTSD

Hallucinations & Flashbacks - an Expected Part of PTSD

As a clinician, I want to be straight with you: I have never seen a case of PTSD without hallucinations. Never. And we need to talk about this openly because hallucinations make us feel legit crazy in a way other symptoms don’t. Ditto for flashbacks.

What’s a Flashback? So glad you asked because flashbacks are nothing like we see in the movies. That would be nice, but real flashbacks are way worse. They are like waking talking nightmares; intense episodes that happen while we’re fully awake. Just like an intruder, flashbacks strike suddenly and feel uncontrollable. Flashbacks are more like a nightmare than a memory because sometimes we can’t tell the difference between the flashback and reality. They’re vivid and feel unbelievably real. Unlike a movie clip, in flashbacks we can see, hear, taste, and smell things. It’s fucking terrifying because it is like the trauma is happening all over again in the moment. Those of us who experience flashbacks often feel like we’re going crazy. You’re not; this is a PTSD symptom. 

When we don’t know that hallucinations and flashbacks are an expected part of PTSD, we can feel like we’re going crazy and very seriously consider suicide - and this makes a lot of sense. We stop feeling like we can trust our brains and our bodies and we can literally start becoming frightened of ourselves and our reactions. We start asking ourselves, “what if I hurt my family?” or “what if I lose my shit in the Walmart?” I very much get you; it can feel like we’ll never come back from this. But you will.

For now, just let this sink in: hallucinations and flashbacks are a normal part of PTSD. Normal doesn’t mean that it’s okay, it just means that hallucinations and flashbacks are common and not unexpected. This is par for the course; you are not a freak. 

Bottom line is that we all deserve to recover from our PTSD symptoms and get our lives back. Get the help you need.

*****

“If you believe change is possible, you want to change, and you are willing to do the work, you absolutely CAN get your life back.”

Get your copy of The Soldier's Guide to PTSD, The Soldier's Workbook, 

or Acknowledge & Heal, A Women's-Focused Guide to PTSD

Ukraine: PTSD Triggers and "Doomscrolling"

I recently learned two new terms: doomscrolling and doomsurfing. This is when we continue to surf or scroll through bad news online, even though that news is saddening, disheartening, or depressing - and even when we know it will make us feel anxious or angry. I have definitely been doing a lot of doomscrolling lately with Russia's attack on Ukraine, and I know I am not alone.

With social media, many of us are watching atrocities happening in Ukraine in real time, and it is not surprising that many of us are reflecting on our own war experiences, whether it’s Vietnam, Iraq, Afghanistan or anything else. These events can activate a fight-or-flight response, and I've heard many Veterans comment that they wish they could join the fight themselves. 

But what do we do when these triggers bring back our PTSD symptoms in full force? We've got answers, so let's take a moment to review PTSD triggers and what we can do about them. 

Understanding Triggers

We all have physical and psychological reactions to threats. This is our brain’s way of keeping us alive, and that is a good thing. This means that our bodies and our brains respond when triggered. Triggers are stimuli that cause our bodies and brains to react.

Triggers can be internal (like pain) or external (like fireworks) and they can bring us right back to remembering our past trauma. The smell of our attacker’s cologne, a box in the middle of the road, the sound of a gunshot - these are all examples of potential triggers.

Triggers can affect us in a variety of ways, making our hearts race to having a full-blown panic attack. Unfortunately, we don’t know our triggers until we experience them. It’s the worst kind of surprise.

And this is where Russia's war on Ukraine comes in; it brings with it many potential triggers because the situation is quickly changing and uncertain. All that not knowing is a trigger generator, and there is conflicting information, a feeling of helplessness, and atrocities happening in real time streaming video online. These triggers can cause flashbacks, hypervigilance, anxiety, inability to relax or sleep, nightmares, and a desire to withdraw from our lives or even end our lives. 

Unfortunately, this is normal. Our brains react to triggers and work hard to keep us alive. Let’s take a knee and respond.

How Do We Respond To Triggers?

First things first: it’s important to stop and choose to be compassionate with ourselves. This war is hard on folks who have no history of trauma and have lots of money and resources available, so let’s intentionally try to be easy on ourselves. Experiencing a trigger is not a character defect. It is our brain’s way of keeping us alive.           

To respond to triggers rather than let them control us, we can create a simple three-step plan: (1) intentionally disengage from things that trigger us (for me that is doomscrolling), (2) explore triggers, and (3) create a self-care plan.

Here’s How This Looks

(1)   Let's unplug (seriously) and reach out to someone we trust to help keep us accountable. If we don't have anyone who can help us, then we can use technology. Pick a firm time and set an alarm to remind you when it is time to unplug and shift gears.

(2) Explore triggers with a counselor or trusted ally or through journaling. Really take time to understand why your brain feels triggered. PTSD is a very logical disorder, and it is likely that your brain is stressed and anxious. Talking about it and journaling about it will help release anxiety and pressure.   

(3)   Create a plan of self-care. It is important to engage in self-care and ensure we are taking care of ourselves physically, emotionally, spiritually, mentally, and emotionally. Triggers can kick us out of gear and affect our sleep, our schedule, and our thoughts and feelings. There are great self-help guides available online, and we can use these to talk with those who support us.

Triggers are normal and do not mean that we are damaged. We absolutely can come back from our PTSD and reclaim our lives.

*****

“If you believe change is possible, you want to change, and you are willing to do the work, you absolutely CAN get your life back.”

Get your copy of The Soldier's Guide to PTSD, The Soldier's Workbook, 

or Acknowledge & Heal, A Women's-Focused Guide to PTSD